Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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