And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
