My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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