are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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