And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
