4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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