ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
