So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
operation have a gay friend backfired
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
