Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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