he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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