U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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