your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
