i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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