U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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