God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Randomize
