My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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