im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
