O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
