You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
