The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize