Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
