i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
