Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
