does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
