sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
