New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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