i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
