Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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