Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
