i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
