when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
