you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
