i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
