she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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