I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
