I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
