Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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