Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
last night I used snow as a chaser
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
