i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
