12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i think my mom watched the whole time
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Found the puke drawer
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
