we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
