Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
