my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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