I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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