White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Randomize