U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Terrible idea I love it
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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