you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
