this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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