another moral hangover. fuck.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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