Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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