call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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